Drift Away
by Wolvesta
Summary: "You're getting a call tomorrow from the Chief. You're being reinstated to active duty. The city gave me the option of transferring you to a different station...I declined." "You won't regret it" "You might" He did
1. Reunion

"You're getting a call tomorrow from the Chief. You're being reinstated to active duty. The city gave me the option of transferring you to a different station...I declined."

"You won't regret it"

"You might"

He did

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2 months went by in the blink of an eye.

Not only did he realize that he wasn't welcomed back into the 118, but he also wasn't welcome back period. And while it hurt, especially when it was those, he considered direct family, Buck understood, because he knew he had hurt them, and they were just acting out in return.

But he took his 'lashings' and punishments without complaint. Doing the terrible chores that no one wanted to and were passed off to him.

Because he understood where everyone was coming from. Even if the month had passed, and Buck had thought they would, at the very least, be forgiving of him by this point. But no one was - no one was talking to him when he entered the firehouse or left it. No one was willing to partner with him, which sucked, because even if he was furious with Eddie, for not understanding, he would still have had the other man's back, but...maybe Eddie didn't have his back in the first place.

Eddie

Oh, how he begged, pleaded, and groveled for forgiveness when it came to Eddie. But it always fell on deaf ears.

"Even you'll never talk to me again...please let me see Christopher" Buck begged when he was on his way out at the same time as Eddie. One month of being ignored, he could handle it, but Christopher...that poor sweet boy didn't deserve this.

"I know I hurt him and you and I made so many mistakes when it came to this lawsuit and Chris and everything else... but please let me see him" Buck pleads with Eddie.

Eddie was going to ignore Buck as he had been doing for the past few times, but he received a text message from his abuela.

**Christopher is having a nightmare **

**He keeps screaming out for that Buck boy **

**You better ****traer ****su ****culo **** especial ****aquí **** Ahora* **

Eddie sighed and told Buck he can come to see Christopher, but nothing else

They haven't spoken since...

Buck was alone

Alone...god he hated that word

It was part of him

He was alone when his parents divorced and left him with his abusive drunk father

He was alone when Maddie left him to elope with Doug

He was alone when he left Hershey

When he bartended in South America

When he passed his Navy Seals testing

When he woke up in the hospital after the bombing

After his pulmonary embolism

After he lost Christopher

He lives alone

Eats alone

Sleeps alone

He is alone...

And as many times he or Maddie told himself/him that he wasn't, it can't change the way he feels

And it can't change the fact...he was meant to be alone...maybe forever

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It was another day in the 118 station when Buck walks in with his bag slung over his shoulder, prepared to be given grueling chores for the whatever time in a row. He put his bag in his locker and changed into his uniform. He had gotten a text earlier from Bobby...

Telling him to come to the pit the second he changes into his uniform. When Buck had read that, a wave of emotions surged through him. He was anxious, scared, happy, and terrified all at the same time.

He went to where the trucks were and saw that Eddie, Hen, Chim, Bobby and a few nameless figures were standing. They were huddled around Bobby, some looking anxious, excited, or expressionless.

He noted the expressions on his 'teammates'. No one said anything for a moment, it was the others standing and staring at Buck from the other side.

"Buck...there's no easy way for me to say this...but you're going to be transferred to a different station," Bobby said slowly as Buck tuned the rest out.

Transferred...he's being transferred

"C-can I ask why?" probably not the best thing to ask if Buck is being honest with himself. He wanted to take the words back as soon as he said them because the looks on the faces of his teammates were enough.

"Are you seriously asking us that?" Eddie chimes in after a beat of silence. Bobby holds up a hand in Eddie's direction, signaling him to stop and let him explain.

"It's only temporary, but the team took a vote and thought that it would be best if you went to a different station for a while," Bobby said, standing tall but masking the emotions behind his eyes.

"We can't work with someone we don't trust," Eddie said after Buck hadn't said anything. Buck only nodded, trying to keep the tears from welling up.

"Go get a box and collect your things. Some people from the station will be here to pick you up soon" Bobby said in a dismissive tone Buck knew that there was no room to argue. He looked to the others for help, but no one would even look at him the eye.

Just like he thought...he was alone

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Buck peered out of the locker room and saw the team mingling with two people he didn't recognize. The must be the people from the station that he is going to be at.

He took longer than necessary because he spent about 5 minutes gathering his things slowly and crying silent tears. By the time he packed what little he had from the station, he wiped his tears away and tried to get his breathing in control.

I did everything just right without complaint...just as they wanted me to...was it not enough?

It's never enough...

Buck was startled out of his thoughts when heard the captain yell

"Buckley let's go!" Bobby yells from a distance and Buck knows that it's time. He takes a shuddering breath to calm his nerves. No use in delaying this any longer. If they didn't want him...then he won't give them more ammunition that will destroy his emotions any more than they have already.

Buck is walking towards the group carrying a box with all his possessions and the bag that he came in with slung over his shoulder. As he's walking towards the group, he takes a closer look at the two-mystery people

That looks like...no that's impossible...it couldn't be... Bobby says something and Buck forces himself to listen.

"Buck, these two are here to pick you up and take you to your station." He looks to the two people "He's all yours" Bobby says as he waves a dismissive hand in Buck's direction. Buck tries to ignore the pang in his heart.

The two people perk up when they hear this and it stops Buck in his tracks. The 118 looks at him in confusion.

That hair...no one has that bright of an orange hair color...not even Abby...

And that gorgeous purple curled hair...he's never seen hair so thick...not since...

The two people turn around and Buck feels his heart and breathing freeze. He ends up dropping the box he's carrying and it causes everyone in the area to look at what's going on.

Buck covers his mouth with his two hands in shock and it manages to slightly silence a gasp.

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"Mi-Mike?! Becca?!" Buck asks as he snaps out of his daze. Buck then lets out a shocked laugh with tears running down his face.

"Evan?" asks the one with curly hair asks in disbelief. The shock is broken when the one with the red hair smiles and makes a beeline for Buck. As he closes in on Buck, instead of giving him a hug he bends down and scoops him up by his knees and spins him around. Buck laughs as he throws his arms around the neck of the one carrying him.

They're both laughing happily as the guy carrying Buck spins him one last time and walks to where the rest of the group is. The second Buck was put down he was immediately embraced by both of the people.

"Yo-you're here?" Buck asked as he looked into the eyes of these two. "I thought I'd never see you again," Buck says as he brings his arms around them both. He pulls back as he gets pelted with fast light kisses on his cheeks and forehead. The purple-haired woman gives one last loud kiss to Buck before she brings him in for the last hug.

"Wa-wait! What are you doing here?!" Buck asks as nostalgia fills his eyes.

"We finally left Pennsylvania. We made our way here and were able to become members of the LAFD. We've only been with our station for about 6 months but it's incredible here!"

"We did it guys..." the red-haired one lets out a laugh as a tear escapes his eye. "We did it...we're here...we're finally together now," He says as he brings them in for a group hug, a mixture of laughter and happiness are the sounds coming from them.

"What exactly is happening right now? You know these people?" The spell is broken and its Chimney who speaks. Buck looks at the 118 and sees the confusion written on their faces.

"Oh, I'm so sorry. Everyone this is Mike Cooks" Buck says as the red-haired one stands straighter and waves. "and this is Rebecca Albany"

"You can call me Becca for short," says the purple-haired one as she flips her hair back over her shoulder

"We were...er...have been friends since childhood. I lived at Becca's house after...an incident and her best friend, Mike, would always come over to escape...a situation" Buck says as he looks over at the two standing next to him. Mike takes Buck's face in between his hands and looks closer at him in the eyes.

"You still have the same baby blue eyes Evan" Buck then blushes and nervously scratches his nose. "Hah, and you still use left thumb to brush your nose when you're nervous...god you haven't changed a bit!" Mike says as he slightly shakes Buck's head and releases him. Buck laughs nervously and smiles shyly at Mike.

"Oh, I don't know...lots of things have happened..." Buck says as he looks down at his hands.

"Like?" Mike asks as he leans closer to Buck. Buck is about to open his mouth when he hears someone shout from behind them all: A voice belonging to someone that he doesn't know

"You know this is the guy that sued the city, right? He did it to get a damn job back. How can you be friends with a traitor like that?" said someone was walking out of the station. It was Campo...

Buck tensed the second he said it. He knew this reunion would be too good to be true, and now the only ones in his corner are going to leave him, just like everyone always leaves. Buck feels the anxiety building and his breathing is beginning to get out of his control. He feels his thoughts spiraling until he's grounded when he feels hands on his own and his face. He opens his eyes and sees Mike standing in front of him, flashing a calm smile:

"Evan, get out of that head of yours...it's not a safe place right now" He feels Becca squeeze his hands as Mike says this.

They aren't leaving?

" We won't leave you, Evan... you can't get rid of us that easily," Becca says.

Buck, still not believing what they are saying is caught off guard when Hen, of all people, says:

"You two are seriously loyal to him..." Hen's mutters under her breath, but loud enough for everyone to hear. Becca and Mike snap their heads in Hen's direction and it throws her off guard to see the annoyance, disbelief and the rage in their eyes.

All directed at him.

"We aren't loyal to him; we are loyal to EACH OTHER. We've been through too much shit together not to be" Becca says letting go of Buck's hands and strutting forward.

"We trust Evan with our lives, so no matter who, what, when, where, and why he did what he did, we trust him. Because that's what it means to be a family, and that's what it means to be a true friend" Mike says as he puts his arms around Buck's waist and pulling him close.

Buck feels a weight come off of his chest at the thought of them not leaving.

"While this has been great and amazing and nostalgic and everything we've ever dreamed of, Stephy is going to have our hides if we don't get Buck to back to the station," Becca says as she steps in between the two groups to break up the interactions.

"Right! Right..." says Mike as he gently facepalms himself for forgetting why they were here in the first place.

"Let me get my stuff," Buck says as he turns around.

"Nonsense we'll help you! It is the least we can do after everything you've done for us," says Becca as she gathers the box and begins walking off with it. Mike meanwhile picks up Buck's bag and is stepping next to Buck. Before they walk out of the station:

"Nice meeting you Captain Nash, and everyone else too! We should all catch drinks some time!" Becca says as she balances the box in one hand and puts out her hand for Bobby to shake. He does, and so do everyone else, though some were still confused at the whole interaction.

Buck bids farewell to the 118 as he leaves with the two individuals, laughing along the way.

When they get to the car:

"Wait!" yells Mike suddenly as he puts Buck's bag down and digs through the box in Becca's arms.

"What are you doing?" asks Buck as he comes to a stop.

"Hold on...got it" Mike pulls out a screwdriver from the box. "Be right back," Mike says as he walks back into the station. He comes back out not a minute later.

"What did you do?" asks Buck but stops as Mike holds up a red sign that read BUCKLEY.

"You're going to need your locker, and we don't want anyone to claim this one! You're not replaceable Evan. Come on let's go!"

He not alone anymore...

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"Are you sure this is a good idea?" asks Hen hesitantly, looking around the room and seeing the main group of Eddie, Chim, and Bobby.

"As much as I hate to say it...while we are glad that Buck is back with us, we can't be worrying about his safety. And even though he trusts us and we trust him, it'll be hard not watching his every move on his first call," says Bobby in a tired voice.

"But are you sure transferring him, even if it's for a month or two is the best course of action? We've basically been ignoring him for two months and now he's going to be transferred...how do you think he's going to take that?" asks Hen again, desperately hoping that they aren't going to go through with this plan.

"I know he'll be pissed at us, but maybe the month away from us will let him cool down...and meanwhile we can try to fully come to terms on what he did, and maybe understand," Bobby says with a voice of finality.

"I just hope we're making the right choice," says Chim looking up and walking away from the group. He should tell Maddie...but he can't handle her disappointing eyes right now, not with everything else that is going on.

Even if we aren't, he will finally know how we felt when he left us

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"Buck...there's no easy way for me to say this...but you're going to be transferred to a different station"

Eddie regretted ever thinking what he thought the moment he saw Buck trying, almost failing to keep his emotions at bay. He felt a wave of emotions when he saw the tears welling up in his eyes. But he pushed the feelings back down in order not to feel, Buck didn't deserve his feelings.

Not after everything he put Christopher through

But he came to Abuela's house and helped Christopher sleep through the night for the first time in a long time

He ignored his voice of reason; he's overwhelmed by anger at Buck for basically abandoning his son

And him...

He gets startled out of his thoughts when he sees two strangers come into the station, looking for Bobby. They say they're coming from the 99th station to pick up the recruit. Eddie wonders how Buck will fare with this new station.

Bobby then calls for Buck to hurry up. Eddie can see Buck peering out from the locker room

Was he crying?

As they see Buck come around the corner, Eddie can see how hard Buck is trying to contain his emotions.

And it hurts to know that he is one of the reasons why

Eddie becomes confused when sees Buck stop in his tracks and drop the box full of his things. He sees something pass through Bucks's eyes before he's crying.

Why is he crying? Is Buck so devastated about leaving us...it's only temporary...maybe this isn't a good idea...maybe

These thoughts are interrupted when the one with the red hair runs to Buck and scoops him up and spins him. Eddie then felt a pang of...something when Buck didn't push him away, he felt the pang worsen when Buck wrapped his arms and legs around the mystery man's body. Laughing

It isn't a lost thought when Eddie realizes that this is the first time, he's heard Buck's laugh in a long time.

Since the tsunami

" We did it guys...we're finally together now..." Eddie wonders what they mean, even an idiot can see these three are close...really close. Eddie had questions but it was Chim that spoke first. Asking what was happening.

Yea...what is happening?

Mike and Becca ...easy to remember

They've been friends since childhood. That's news.

Now that he thinks about it...Buck never talked about his childhood...like ever. Just this year he found out he had a sister

"I lived at Becca's house after...an incident and her best friend, Mike, would always come over to escape...a situation" Eddie gets a bad feeling in his chest that he can't explain. Did something happen to Buck in his childhood tha- Eddie's thoughts are interrupted when he sees Mike putting Buck's head in between his hands and it was then he understood the continuous panging in his chest

Jealousy

But that's impossible, Eddie has no reason to be jealous

You're jealous because you aren't the one who does that...

Eddie shook the thoughts away when he heard the comment of Buck's eyes...yea they were a beautiful shade of blue.

It's not like you are fascinated with them...or are you?

Eddie never noticed how Buck brushed his thumb across his nose...god had he always done that?

Eddie secretly cringed when Campo outed Buck on his lawsuit. He was waiting to see the reactions of the ones next to Buck but was thrown for a loop when he heard Mike say to get out of his head...had Buck been on the verge of a panic attack?

How out of tune was he with Buck?

And Hen's comment didn't put Eddie's mind at ease. What the fuck had they gone through? By the time he was brought back to reality, he saw that Buck and the others were gone. He hadn't remembered shaking her hand, agreeing to go out for drinks...

Eddie didn't know what else to expect but then Mike walked in with a screwdriver and began prying off Buck's name tag.

"What are you doing with that?" asked Eddie stepping forward to stop this guy, but the sign came off with a firm click noise.

"Evan is going to need his locker. He's one of us now and we sure as hell are going to make him feel welcomed" Mike said as he waved around the sign.

This is going to be one hell of a month

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It was two days later that the team minus Buck, gathered in the kitchen area to have some breakfast. They all arrived around 9:00 and Bobby had invited Athena over to the station for breakfast. A big part of him wanted to invite Buck, but he still saw his team on edge about him. But one person he did invite was Athena. She didn't start until later and had happily accepted the invitation.

"Well ain't that a bitch..." Athena said as she clicked her tongue, walking into the 118 station early one morning to have breakfast with the team. She's scrolling through some documents in on a phone. A professionally dressed woman is trailing behind her, holding a briefcase and what looks to be a box. Athena's hands back the phone.

"Everyone this is my friend Saleha, she's a DA, is Buck here? She needs to talk to him."

"He's not here. He's at a different station, temporarily at least" Bobby says as he finishes plating a ham and cheese omelet for Hen and spoons bacon on Eddie's plate. He looks away from Athena when she fixes him a knowing look.

"Oh, he's not here? I'll find him somewhere else then" Before she could leave Bobby told her to stay for some food.

"I can't believe you two did it...wow" Athena breathes out a sigh of disbelief as she walks to the island where her plate of food is. She gives Bobby a quick kiss and squeezes his wrist,

"Thanks, hun," she says as she and Saleha take a seat.

"What happened 'Thena? You look off." asks Hen as they take a seat next to her.

"Well Saleha is She used to be a detective but now she's a prosecutor. She told me a while ago that she and someone were working together to bring down some crooked lawyer...I just never thought that..." she snorts lowly "what a small world..." Athena says as she spoons her food. "I knew Buck was up to something. Just wish you could have told me..."

"We had to keep it under wraps for the information not to get out and blow the months of work we have piled up"

"Wait...what are you talking about? What does this have to do with Buck?" Bobby asks, standing next to the table where they are at. Eddie slightly tensing at the name Buck. It had been a sore spot ever since he and the lawyer revealed information about them that was supposed to stay between the team.

"Evan and I were secretly working together to bring down that lawyer that Buck had to take. He was practicing law without a license; he was running an illegal sting operation to gather intel and swindled people out of their settlements."

"What do you mean sting operations?" asks Chim

"He would use some dirty cops, they were all arrested by the way, for their power in the police records to gather secret information on the people his clients were suing. Evan told me about how the ex-lawyer knew information about your personal lives that he didn't disclose. I told him not to disclose any information about you all to see what the lawyer said...I had Buck record the session with all of you to get evidence. Sorry about that by the way, I didn't know he would dig that deep into your personal lives, but the good news is we got him" Saleha finished as she drank her remaining coffee

"Sal I think you need to start from the beginning," Athena says as she sees the looks of confusion on everyone's face.

"So, Buck and I have been...pretty decent friends since last year, and the day of the fire drill he told me that a shady looking lawyer approached people and him about suing the building and city for money. When I took a look at the business card, I knew this wasn't an opportunity that I could wait. I asked for his help as well as help from some officers I knew I could trust. I told him straight from the get-go that in order to help me with this case, he had to 'sue', note the air quotes, the city for his job back. He said he needed a day to think about it but later that night he told me that his captain is the reason he doesn't have his job back yet, by the way super fucked up thing to do and say. After one cheap beer and one helluva crying session later, we talked about the potential case and I said, jokingly by the way, that this would be the perfect opportunity to set the case into motion if Buck presented a fake lawsuit of suing the city to get his job back because what that lawyer was doing to people was unconstitutional and...he agreed. I didn't think he'd do it but he agreed. And I didn't think he'd get his job back, but he's back...win-win for everyone...'cept for that lawyer. Good thing too, he was planning to go after you all"

Sal finished explaining the story as she poured herself a glass of orange juice and was confused when everyone erupted with questions, Athena managed to calm everyone.

"What do you mean to come after us?" asked Eddie, speaking up for the first time since Saleha came in.

"You're Henrietta Wilson, right?" Sal asks as she looks to Hen, getting a confirming nod. "We found records indicating that the lawyer was planning on digging up dirt on you and your wife so you two could lose your son. If he couldn't find anything, then the cops would plant evidence and forge your records to make you look bad. And Eddie Diaz? He was planning on seeing you as an unfit parent so you could be arrested and lose custody of your son. For Bobby, he was planning on outing you and your past to the public. Athena, he wanted to paint you like a dirty cop and an irresponsible mother because of what happened to your daughter. And Chimney...we still can't find anything of you in his records...maybe he didn't get to you yet" Sal said as looked into her briefcase and handed out copies of the records to the respective people.

"Why would this sick bastard do this?" asked Hen, paling at the fact that she could have lost her son and wife. The rest weren't going so well either.

How did this pedazo de mierda know about the fighting ring...and how dare he try to take his son away

"He is still being fully investigated but I personally think it's cause Buck turned down the settlement money. 7 million dollars...can you believe it? The biggest settlement in the history of LA, and he turned it down all because he wanted his job back. I mean I know it was a fake lawsuit but still...I would have taken it and ran off to Barbados"

"Wait...7 million dollars? Was it really that much?" Eddie asked in disbelief, desperately hoping that he wasn't wrong. That he and the team didn't make a huge mistake.

"We couldn't tell the city about our plans because we didn't know who to trust, so they believed it was a real lawsuit, and if huge IF Buck had actually taken the money...well he certainly wouldn't be here right now. You all are seriously lucky to have such a loyal friend like him. They're so hard to find in this day and age" Saleha said as she downed the last of her orange juice.

"Look I have to get going, I have a hearing soon but thank you so much for having me and allowing me to explain on his behalf. And if you see him can you give him this box of cannolis, please? Or you can take them since he's not here. I'll just get him some more when I see him. If you have any more questions feel free to call me" Saleha said as she exited the station.

No one had said anything for a long while. The same thoughts had been running through their heads. Had Buck done all of this...for them? He went through the wringer just to protect them from suffering more than they had, and look at how they treated him.

They abandoned him and kicked him to the curb, only because of a supposed betrayal. And now they can't even apologize, he's not here right now.

"What have we done?" whispered Eddie as he struggled to stand. The force of what he had been doing to his friend coming back in full force. Ignoring him, denying him, brushing him off when he wanted to help with his son, cutting him out of his life.

His heart

" We fucked up," Hen said, voice thick with tears.

I'm so sorry little bro...I'm so sorry

What am I going to tell Maddie? She knows what's happening at the station, the tension, and transfer, but this?

Bobby felt like he needed a drink, but he shook those thoughts away, remembering that Buck was the one that helped him when he was going through a difficult time.

"We need to make this right," says Bobby with his Captain's voice. They agreed that they needed to apologize to Buck and make this right...

...But how?


	2. Pasts

A week barely went by since the news, and it wasn't lost that there was some serious tension in the 118 on a particular day. They have tried time and time again to get a hold of Buck, but he's either working, with his friends or at home, not wanting to talk to them. Eddie tried calling him, but it went straight to voicemail.

Except for when he needed Buck for Christopher, then he would respond ASAP.

"Anyone else have a bad feeling about today?" asks Chim attempting to break the tension surrounding the group like a cloud that won't go away.

"It's not a bad feeling, it just feels like something is going to happen today," says Hen in return. Bobby was about to say something when the siren went off.

ATTENTION ALL MEMBERS OF THE 118 AND SURROUNDING STATIONS, WE NEED ALL HANDS-ON DECK. I REPEAT, WE NEED ALL HANDS-ON DECK!

All first responders rallied together and piled as much of their supplies in the short span of time they had. Within one minute, they were on their way to the call.

There are reports of a 10-story building being on fire.

"Be careful everyone, 75% of the building is on fire and it has been cleared out by other first responders. We do what we can where we can" Bobby says from the front

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The team is shocked to see Buck at the scene. Bobby doesn't know why he does, but he asks:

"What are you doing here?"

"They said all hands-on deck," Buck said in a sarcastic tone. The team pales when they hear Buck's clipped tone at them.

Eddie is taken aback to see the distance in Buck's eyes.

They have an apology ready at their tongue but then:

"Buckley! Albany! You two make sure to keep people back and begin putting out the fire with the hose. Cooks watch their backs and help in any way you can!" are the words that are barked out by the captain of the 99th station. The three rush out to do as they're told.

"I'm assuming your Captain Robert Nash?"

"Yes, Bobby" replies as he shakes the other one's hand

"I'm Stephania Santana but you can call me Stephy. I just wanted to say thank you so much for lending us your boy Buck. He's been a real help on and off the field. And he's such a team player. I'm glad Cooks and Albany got his back. I know he has theirs"

"Yea...he's reliable that way," Bobby says hesitantly, wishing desperately that Buck was back with them.

"You know we might keep him," Stephy says laughing at the end, indicating it was a joke, but for some reason, it bothered Bobby to no end that another station will get to keep Buck. He belonged with the 118, his family...Before Bobby can respond, Buck yells out:

"There's someone up there!" Buck yells as he points to someone sticking their head out one of the windows...is that a kid?

Buck springs into action, he orders Becca to position the truck as close as possible to the window and extend the ladder as long as possible. Buck begins climbing the ladder with Mike right behind him. Buck is able to reach the kid's window.

"You need to jump to me sweetie I can't reach you"

"I'm scared!" screams the little girl, looks about ten.

"I know you are but you need to jump. It's not too far and I promise I'll catch you" with a burst of encouragement, the little girl stands on the ledge of the window and jumps as far as she can. Buck catches her instantly and secured her.

"You did great sweetie. I'm going to hand you off to someone else so they can take care of you ok?" Buck hands the little girl off to Mike and he hands her off to Hen and Chim waiting at the foot of the truck.

"Mike! Buck! You did well now come down so we can finish putting out the fire" calls out Stephy. Mike is making his way down when they both hear a creaking noise. Suddenly the ladder breaks in half and it sends Buck off the edge of the ladder. He screams as he knows he's about to fall almost 100ft to the unforgiving ground...again.

That is until he feels someone grab his hand.

"I gotcha Evan!" yells Mike as he grabs Buck's hands with his own. Mike's lower half of his body is on the ladder while his arms are over the edge, grabbing Buck's arms and hands.

"Thanks, Mike! But just let go! It's not that far a drop!" Buck says as he dangles off the edge, unable to reach the ladder with his other hand.

"I won't have you messing up your leg again...you've worked too hard!" Mike says with an effort as he feels Buck slipping from his grip. "Becca catch him!" Mike yells as Buck falls from his grip completely. Becca is there, barely placing an air mattress on the floor as Buck lands in it. He's pulled out instantly by Becca and Mike. They give him a fast once over and resume their work.

Once the fire has been completely put out, the first responders check on the civilians and their own.

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The 118 swore they felt their hearts stop when they saw Buck fall off the ladder. Eddie wanted nothing more than to run over and catch him, but he was too far away.

All of them were. There was some relief when he saw Mike catch him but he felt his heart in his throat as Buck slipped from his grip.

Oh god, he was going to be killed...he was going to die, he was going to die, he-

The mantra gets cut off when Becca places a giant airbag to catch Buck, and Eddie felt like collapsing. The only thing stopping him from running over to the cite was Bobby's hand on his shoulder, telling him to get back to work.

He swallowed his emotions and continued on

They do make a great team

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Eddie is holding the phone in his shaking hands. This probably isn't a good idea, considering how late it is and how exhausted he was. But his fingers flew across the screen without his consent. Before he could stop, he sent a message:

Eddie: Hey Buck. You up?

Buck: Yea what's up?

Eddie: Just checking in on you. You ok after that fall?

Buck: I didn't technically fall, but yes, I'm good. Becca and Mike took me back to their apartment and patched me up

Eddie: Patched you up? Were you hurt?

Buck: I got one nasty bump on my forehead from hitting my head against the steel, but I don't have a concussion. Also, I may have pulled a muscle in my shoulder. Nothing to worry about. Why?

Eddie: Just checking in...actually Christopher saw the news and wanted to make sure you're ok. He kind of wants to see you

Buck: I'm on my way

Eddie: It's like 10:30 at night rn

Buck: I'm on my fuckin way

Buck gets there in 15 minutes and can calm Chris down and constantly reassures him that he's ok. Chris falls asleep on Buck and Buck quickly follows him into a deep sleep. Eddie ends up taking a picture of them to save for himself, he hopes that he can explain himself in the morning. Maybe Buck can at least talk to him.

When he wakes, Buck is gone and all evidence of him being there at all is still steaming pancakes on the kitchen counter.

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Bobby and Athena invite the team over to their house for a late wedding reception later that week. Athena insisted that he invite Buck over. He's still part of the family they've created.

At least Bobby hopes Buck is still is, after everything...

Bobby remembers going to 099 station and asking a member if Buck or Stephy was there. They led him to where the commons area was and Bobby saw something that left a pang of longing in his heart. Stephy and a few others were sitting at the table while Mike, Becca, and Buck were talking, laughing, and cooking.

They were cooking together

Bobby can't tell what he is cooking from this angle, but he can smell it and it makes his mouth water. Bobby approaches the kitchen and Buck notices his presence, but instead of saying something, he turns his back to him and continues his task.

Buck takes a deep breath in and out before turning back to face his former captain.

"Hey Bobby" it hurts Bobby when he calls him by his name, it shouldn't but he knows why

He's used to this kid calling him Cap

"We're cooking the 99 some food, do you want some?" Buck asks but hoping he doesn't have to stay, he can't face his former captain right now.

"No thanks I have a shift in 30 minutes, but...can I talk to you for a sec?" Bobby asks hoping that he'll say yes. Buck reluctantly nods yes. He gives Mike and Becca instructions to let the sauce simmer for 5 more minutes before adding it to the quinoa.

"What's up Bobby?" asks Buck getting straight to the point.

"Athena and I are having a late wedding reception at our house and just wanted to know if you want to come?" Bobby asks, trying to bury the hope that's rising in his system, Buck can still say no. And even though Bobby will understand, it will hurt.

"Um...are you sure you want me there?" Buck says after a long while of thinking it over. He wants to be with the 118, even if it is for a small get together, but he still has doubts.

"Of course, we want you there, everyone does and so does Athena."

"Bobby, I don't know-"

"Christopher is going to be there! And he wants you to be there too" Buck narrows his eyes slightly at Bobby, that's playing dirty because Bobby knows that Buck won't say no when it comes to Christopher, but instead of calling it out, Buck sighs:

"Ok fine, I'll come. Under one condition"

"Anything"

"Mike and Becca are coming too," Buck says with a voice of finality, leaving no room to argue. And as much as Bobby doesn't want them to come, he wants to be a little selfish and have Buck all to themselves.

So they can apologize and hopefully earn his trust again...

But Bobby relents and says that it's perfectly fine if they come too. Buck seems satisfied with the answer.

"Buck listen...I'm sorry about-" Bobby gets cut off when Buck waves his hand in the same dismissive hand that was shown to him not even a week ago

"I'll see you at the party Bobby," Buck says as he goes back to the kitchen where Mike and Becca are serving people, Buck steps in to help.

Bobby leaves the station, stopping only briefly to see the banner that was placed upon the entrance of the station. He knew they should have put up a sign

WELCOME TO THE 99 EVAN BUCKLEY

They were treating him better in the first week than the 118 had in 2 months

And it hurt knowing that they had no one to blame but themselves

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It was the night of the party and Buck's anxiety would climb the closer they got to the house.

"Talk to us Evan...what's going on in that head of yours?" Becca pulled him out of his thoughts

"My anxiety is acting up, the last few times I've been here, something bad as always happened to me. Last time I was here, Bobby told me he was the reason I wasn't going back to work, then everything just went downhill from there..." Buck explains to them.

"Don't worry hun, Mike and I will be right next to you the whole time."

"You don't have to do this alone. We're here for you" Buck took a deep breath a prepared himself for what was on the other side of the door.

Buck knocked on the door and waited for it to be opened. Athena opened the door and smiled instantly when she saw who was on the other side.

"Hey, Buck! Welcome" Athena said as Buck wrapped his arms around her in a hug, she happily returned it. He introduced his friends to Athena and she welcomed them with literal open arms.

"Thank you so much for having us here in your home," Becca says taking a small bow.

"Oh, none of that Hunny, any friend of Buck's is an automatic friend of mine" Athena winked as she stepped out of the way to let them in. As Buck and company walked into the house, he was immediately engulfed in a small hug by Christopher, Buck immediately gripped and bent down to pick him up.

"Hey, buddy! How you been superman?" Buck asks giving Chris a tight hug and kissing him on the cheek. Christopher immediately smiled and laughed

"Look at my new haircut!" Christopher said as he pointed to his head.

"I love it! Aw, man, you look like a million bucks" Buck says as he affectionately ruffles his hair as Christopher laughs, he then looks at the two new faces and buries his head in Buck's shoulder.

"New friends?" asks Christopher in a shy whisper

"Yes. Christopher this is Becca and Mike. Guys this is Christopher"

"Nice to meet you, Christopher," Becca says as she extends a hand, Christopher smiles and wobbly shakes it. Same thing with Mike.

"They've been my best friends since I was just a little older than you bud" Buck, still carrying Christopher, they make their way into the main dining room area where everyone else is. Buck feels his breath hitch when he sees everyone's eyes on him. He's always hated so many eyes on him at once. Before he could say anything, he felt Becca and Mike squeeze both sides of his shoulders. They step in front of him, effectively blocking everyone's view from Buck.

"Thank you so much for having us! We've never been to a wedding reception so we thought about bringing wine but Evan said there would be kids here so we brought a whole lot of these" Mike opens the bag over his shoulder and pulls out various flavors of alcohol-free sparkling juice.

"Dibs on the white grape!" "Back off it's mine!" Yells Denny and Harry running into the room and taking the bottle off of the countertop.

"Not too many kids!" Athena yells after them. May then pokes her head around the corner

"Uncle Buck we're playing Mario Kart! Come play with us!" May says as she waves her hand, beckoning him to the TV room. Harry and Denny stop fighting for the bottle and begin begging Buck to play Wii with them.

"Move, let me show you how it's done," Buck says as he places Christopher on the couch and taking a remote.

Later in the middle of playing, they hear the announcement of dinner being served. Buck takes a seat and somehow ends up next to Eddie even when Buck wanted to sit in between his two friends, but on his other side is Christopher so it's not too bad. Especially when Becca and Mike are across from him.

Dinner was fantastic as usual. Everyone talked and laughed like nothing was wrong, but they still needed to talk. But at least they could pretend everything was ok.

At least for now...

He felt Eddie's gaze on him throughout the evening.

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Eddie had arrived with Christopher to the party about 30 minutes before Buck was due to arrive. He pointed Christopher to where the other kids were and made his way to where everyone else was.

"Hey Cap hey Athena, thanks for having us and congrats again," Eddie says as he gives them both a hug.

"Thanks, Ed. Glad to have you here" Bobby said as he took the small wrapped gift box and place it to the side. He greets everyone else: Hen, Karen, Chim, Maddie, even Saleha was there.

"Where's Buck? Is he coming?" asked Eddie seeing that he is still not in the group. Athena takes over the cooking as Bobby steps away to talk to everyone else, who has joined the conversation after hearing the name, Buck.

"Yea he said they'll be here so-" Bobby is interrupted by Eddie

"They? Those two other ones are coming too?"

"Buck made it clear if they can't come then he sees no point in coming. I guess he doesn't want to be with us by himself just yet..."

It hurt knowing that the only reason Buck is weary of them is because of their faults.

"Wait, who else is coming?" Maddie asks. When she heard about what Buck did for them after what the 118 did to him, she had to physically restrain herself from running to his house right then and there or slapping Chimney. She did neither, instead, she later went to his house after work and they talked.

"It's not fair what they did to you...it isn't fair"

"I did everything they asked of me. I never complained...not once...but it wasn't enough was it?" Maddie instantly brought Buck into a hug.

"Evan, it was more than enough but it was their mistake. Not yours, it was never yours. Chim is telling me that they want to talk to you and apologize. You should at least give them a chance to explain themselves...but only if you want to. There's no pressure at all." Maddie was the one who looked out for him when he was a kid, and even now she is. So if she thinks he should...

"Ok, maybe I will, just not now. It's too soon"

"I understand bro. So tell me about your new station. Are they nice to you?"

" Two friends from his new station are coming. Apparently, they've been his friends since he was a kid"

"Wait that's impossible...Evan didn't have any friends when he was a kid. What are their names?"

"Rebecca and Mike"

"I've never met them...hell I've never even heard of them," Maddie said as she shook her head in confusion. This statement sends a jolt of confusion through everyone. If Maddie had never heard of them, then either Buck is lying about being childhood friends or..

"He must be pretending to be friends with them in order to get back as us for treating him so badly" Hen voices, not realizing that she said it out loud, sending everyone into even more confusion. If they aren't friends, then...

Maybe I still have a chance, to make this right and tell him how I feel

But what if he doesn't feel the same for you? What if he hates you because of what you said and he'll never want to be near you or Christopher again?

The self-doubts were coming back in full force. Stinging his heart with every question. Eddie is pulled out of his reverie when he hears a knock at the door. Athena goes to answer and Eddie's heartthrobs when he sees Mike and Becca holding Buck's hand. They let go to shake Athena's hand and they enter. He tried not to let his eyes linger on them too long.

But he sees his son run over, well...as best as he can, to the door when he hears Buck's voice. He's immediately enveloped in a hug by Buck who loves his new haircut. Eddie smiles seeing the way Buck interacts with his son.

A selfish part of him wishes that he could lock time at this moment and live in it forever. Seeing his two-favorite people in the world getting along, loving each other just the way they are. The moment is lost when Buck is introducing his son to his friends, and even though he is shy at first, he still smiles at them. He sees them enter the house and Eddie can see the panic on Buck's face when he comes down from the stairs. The look makes him want to wrap him in a blanket and never let him go.

But he can't

He lost the right to even be his friend and he needs to earn it back

He feels a mixture of jealousy and sadness when he sees Mike squeeze Buck's shoulder. The act itself isn't what bothers Eddie, it's the reaction of Buck being instantly relaxed at the simple gesture.

Are they...together? Am I too late?

He saw how they stepped in front of Buck to shield him from the prying eyes and felt a surge of pride at the thought of someone being in his corner. Even if it wasn't the 118, he's still glad that someone is with him.

They tell the people at the party that they brought non-alcoholic drinks to the party because Buck said there would be kids at the party is just another thing to add to the list of good things that Buck has done for them. He smiles when hears Denny and Harry fighting over the juice and when Buck plays Mario Kart with Christopher until dinner is ready.

He ends up sitting next to Buck during the dinner, and as much as he wants to talk to him, to say he's sorry, to say he made a terrible mistake, to say that he doesn't hate him and all he wants to do is love him and never let him go. But he can't

Instead, he just watches him

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About 30 minutes later, Athena and Bobby send the kids to play with beanbags and the new swing set Bobby and Michael installed a week earlier. The adults were gathered around the dining room area. Buck, Mike, and Becca were off to the side talking together. The 118 looks at them, wishing that they were in their mix. They go back to their conversation but it's interrupted by Buck's coughing.

They look at him in concern and it takes everything that they have not to run over to Buck to make sure he's ok. Maddie rushed over to Buck but freezes, unsure what to do and how to help. Buck's coughing doesn't stop for what seems like hours, but when he finally stops:

"I'm ok" his voice is thick from coughing so much. "I'm fine, I drank something and it went the wrong way." Buck clears his voice as Eddie hesitantly walks up to him.

"Are you sure you're ok?" Eddie asks, wanting to place his hands somewhere, anywhere to ground himself, to know that Buck is still here and this isn't another pulmonary embolism.

"Eddie...guys I swear I'm ok. I just drank something terrible..." Buck says as he looks him in the eyes, he tears his eyes away from Eddie to look at Mike and Becca.

And it kills him not to have those beautiful eyes watch him.

" Seriously, what in the hell is this drink? This is terrible!" Buck says as he starts laughing. Becca says:

"It's Jeppson's Malört. The most disgusting alcohol on the face of the Earth, and you just tried it...again"

"Ugh! It tastes like the water from the bottom of a garbage can...this is disgusting!" Buck smiles as he down some water that was on the counter

"Buck...are you sure you're ok?" Eddie asks, hesitantly putting his hands-on Bucks shoulders. He regrets it immediately when he feels Buck tense slightly beneath them, but Buck plasters on a smile.

"I swear I'm ok," Buck says

"I haven't seen you fall for that since back home," Mike says laughing. "W-we used to pull this shit on each other all the time. H-he used to sneak out of the house just to come to hang out with us and we acted like idiots"

"We are idiots!" Buck said to both of them

"Wait-sneak out of the house? Buck you never snuck out of the house and...who exactly are these two? You introduced us to them as your childhood friends but Evan I've never met them before in my life..." Maddie says, finally speaking up after Buck's coughing fit. Eddie sees the way Buck instantly tenses when Maddie says this. Buck takes a deep breath and speaks

"Ok..I-I was hoping to avoid this...but if you must know, I'll tell you," Buck says as he feels his body shaking in anxiety. He takes a deep breath to calm himself.

"I met Rebecca when I was about 10 years old. I was on my way home from school when I saw some bullies picking on her. I told them to leave her alone and afterward, I went to her house, that's where I meet Mike. I spent the night with them and we've been close ever since."

"10? But Buck...I told you not never to spend the nights away from home because-" Maddie trails off, not wanting to stir up old memories.

"Because of dad? Is that what you were going to say? What was I supposed to do? Stay and let him beat the shit out of me? Or be in a stranger's house while he slept off the alcohol? He didn't even notice I was gone until I snuck back in while he was still sleeping and I got ready for school and they met me outside. We walked to school together and we stayed together"

"I would have been there to protect you, Ev-" Maddie gets interrupted

"You left me!" Buck almost screamed, the emotional dam finally bursting as a tear made its way down his face. "You left me when you went marry Doug because you thought he could help you escape our shitty childhoods and when I told you he was bad news; you didn't listen to me and you said that-that I was too young and too naïve to know what real love is." Buck stutters, wrapping his arms around his middle in a form of self-protection, he stumbled backward into a chair that Becca had pushed him towards and Mike had sat him down gently. Mike had one arm wrapped around Buck's front shoulders while Becca did the same thing on the opposite. Both hands meeting in near his chest and Buck's hands fly up to meet theirs to ground himself.

"I don't blame you for taking all of Doug's shit. I, in no way, shape, or form blame you for any of the shit you went through...but I resent you because you got out and even though you jumped into a bad situation...I had to deal with what you left behind. With you gone, dad took all his anger and resentment on me, if it wasn't physical, it was emotional and mental. Always telling me I was the reason mom died, the reason why you left was because of me. I didn't believe it at first but he said it so many times I believed it. I still have the scar from when he hit me with his gin bottle" He points to his 'birthmark'.

"I had no one...and that's when I started hanging around them more. I would go to Becca's house because her parents were so nice and welcoming. They always took care of me when dad got too violent. Her mom was a nurse and would always patch me up. Her dad was a chef and would always make me dinner since our dad was too drunk to do anything besides making me feel like shit." Buck trails off, tears streaming down his face as he feels himself getting lost in the bad memories, but he feels himself come back to the present when he feels the hands on his shoulders squeeze and tighten on him.

"Mike would come over to escape his overbearing mother all the time, and when my dad made us food, he would stay over and we would stay up and talk about life, and we just grew closer. Before we knew it, we were all we had. My mom passed away from ovarian cancer and my dad lost his battle with depression...I was 18 at the time and he left me the house"

"My mom left me after she relapsed on heroin. Her new boyfriend took her to Chicago...haven't heard from her in over 15 years..." supplied Mike sullenly.

"Dad kicked me out of the house when he found out I was bi and we ended up living in Becca's house since she was the only one who was 18 at the time, and while she was the one who legally owned the house, we all took jobs to support ourselves. We raised enough money to take a vacation at Surf Beach where I learned to bartend. Before we went home, Becca found out that the city foreclosed the house because of some legal bullshit. So, we were stuck there for a while and to make payments for the motel, we were staying at I had to take bartending jobs and every single tip I ever got went to pay for where we were staying. We caught a break and we were able to go to LA where I joined the Navy Seals but ended up dropping out because of my stupid emotions. We made it into the academy together, but then we lost touch after the tsunami because we lost our phones and the lines were shit." Mike and Becca supply their nods in confirmation.

"AND THAT is how we ended up here," Buck says making a vague gesture with his hands.

Silence resonated through the house, the only sounds coming from the kids outside.

* * *

Thanks for reading! Feel free to review! View this story on AO3 with the same username because I usually update there first.

FYI: Need a visual for Mike and Becca? Look on my AO3 to view the links.


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